Here I am. Meeting with God. In very not-so-everyday surroundings. At first I was in awe of the beauty, excited for this opportunity. Then I became uncomfortable with the frivolity of it all. So, I tried to do what I do best...put rules on the situation. Because I've been making breaks with my legalistic side, the absurdity of it all quickly became apparent. I still could not decompress, however...don't I have to be doing something? Not so, contends my Maker.
What is this all about? I am away. On vacation. Celebrating life with my husband. For the first time since our honeymoon eighteen years ago. We planned for this trip. We budgeted for this trip. We looked forward to this trip. And now, it is here. And it is wonderful. Can I tell you just how wonderful it is? Our day started with books arriving in the mail...need I say anymore? Then I got a pedicure and we had a leisurely lunch. We arrived at our hotel and I was surprised at the beauty around me. The hotel, the room, the scenery--it is all beautiful. I have spent the better part of the last three hours on our deck overlooking the golf course (where my husband is currently), reading An American Childhood by Annie Dillard and snacking away.
Sounds simple, right? Should be...or should it? It feels frivolous...but the quiet, the solitude, the refreshing connection with nature...it feeds me. The breeze that blows through my hair and ruffles the pages of my book comforts me. The stillness, not having constant demands, gives me mental space. And still it took me time to down-shift into pleasure-reading mode...I think I read the prologue three times before I felt drawn in...I even dozed briefly...I took pictures of the surroundings...and imagine my surprise when there was a knock on the door and I received a beautiful gift of champagne and strawberries...very Pretty Woman-esque...
The dichotomy of this situation does not escape me, though...today, a friend goes to chemotherapy...today, I have two friends recovering from surgery...today, a friend of mine delivers her daughter to the Naval Academy to begin her training...today, there are people who are hungry, lonely, lost, homeless, and hurting...and through this experience I actually feel deeper about those people and their situations than when I am consumed by my own crazy, chaotic life.
What is this all about? I am away. On vacation. Celebrating life with my husband. For the first time since our honeymoon eighteen years ago. We planned for this trip. We budgeted for this trip. We looked forward to this trip. And now, it is here. And it is wonderful. Can I tell you just how wonderful it is? Our day started with books arriving in the mail...need I say anymore? Then I got a pedicure and we had a leisurely lunch. We arrived at our hotel and I was surprised at the beauty around me. The hotel, the room, the scenery--it is all beautiful. I have spent the better part of the last three hours on our deck overlooking the golf course (where my husband is currently), reading An American Childhood by Annie Dillard and snacking away.
Sounds simple, right? Should be...or should it? It feels frivolous...but the quiet, the solitude, the refreshing connection with nature...it feeds me. The breeze that blows through my hair and ruffles the pages of my book comforts me. The stillness, not having constant demands, gives me mental space. And still it took me time to down-shift into pleasure-reading mode...I think I read the prologue three times before I felt drawn in...I even dozed briefly...I took pictures of the surroundings...and imagine my surprise when there was a knock on the door and I received a beautiful gift of champagne and strawberries...very Pretty Woman-esque...
The dichotomy of this situation does not escape me, though...today, a friend goes to chemotherapy...today, I have two friends recovering from surgery...today, a friend of mine delivers her daughter to the Naval Academy to begin her training...today, there are people who are hungry, lonely, lost, homeless, and hurting...and through this experience I actually feel deeper about those people and their situations than when I am consumed by my own crazy, chaotic life.
I will accept this time with my husband as a beautiful gift. I will relish it. I will be thankful for it. I will look for God in it. I will grow from it. But, as I head back to "real life" where we all live, I want to be renewed in my compassion for others and passion for my faith.
Lord, please direct me, change me and grow me so that I may help bring healing to your children.
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