Calling.
This word has plagued me lately. It sounds official, yet natural. Important, yet common. This theme of calling encompasses my mind at times…
Why?
Because for all the twists and turns life has taken the last three years, it is not over. Because decisions have to be made. Because I want to be obedient to God and at the same time be fulfilled…
This is what I know…
that the only thing I have to be ashamed of is my sin…
that I’m accountable to God in the end…
that I have choices while I’m here…
that I’m scared…
that I idolize approval…
that I want more of God (or is it more proper to say, I want him to have more of me)…
that the combination of all of these things creates havoc in my mind!
As I move forward when I want to go back, I gain strength. As I set goals, I begin to conquer fear. As I trust God, I gain confidence in His power.
Yet still…I hold back.
From what? For what?
I’m not sure…I think there are things I need to let go of before I take another step…things that aren’t helpful, but are very comfortable…things that can unsettle me, but I believe anyway…
Where has all this rambling taken me?
To my knees, where I belong… To prayer, where God meets me…and I can ask Him about my calling.
Thank you, Lord, that you know my calling and you are trustworthy.
This word has plagued me lately. It sounds official, yet natural. Important, yet common. This theme of calling encompasses my mind at times…
Why?
Because for all the twists and turns life has taken the last three years, it is not over. Because decisions have to be made. Because I want to be obedient to God and at the same time be fulfilled…
This is what I know…
that the only thing I have to be ashamed of is my sin…
that I’m accountable to God in the end…
that I have choices while I’m here…
that I’m scared…
that I idolize approval…
that I want more of God (or is it more proper to say, I want him to have more of me)…
that the combination of all of these things creates havoc in my mind!
As I move forward when I want to go back, I gain strength. As I set goals, I begin to conquer fear. As I trust God, I gain confidence in His power.
Yet still…I hold back.
From what? For what?
I’m not sure…I think there are things I need to let go of before I take another step…things that aren’t helpful, but are very comfortable…things that can unsettle me, but I believe anyway…
Where has all this rambling taken me?
To my knees, where I belong… To prayer, where God meets me…and I can ask Him about my calling.
Thank you, Lord, that you know my calling and you are trustworthy.
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